RCCG Sunday School Student Manual 3 May 2026 – Lesson 35
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TOPIC: Parenting Styles (Part 1) (RCCG Sunday School Student Manual 3 May 2026)
MEMORY VERSE: And the younger of them said to his father, Father, give me the portion of goods that falleth to me. And he divided unto them his living. – Luke 15:12 (KJV)
BIBLE PASSAGE: 1 Samuel 2:22-25,29 (KJV) (RCCG Sunday School Student Manual 3 May 2026)
1 Samuel 2:22-25
22 Now Eli was very old, and heard all that his sons did unto all Israel; and how they lay with the women that assembled at the door of the tabernacle of the congregation.
23 And he said unto them, Why do ye such things? for I hear of your evil dealings by all this people.
24 Nay, my sons; for it is no good report that I hear: ye make the Lord’s people to transgress.
25 If one man sin against another, the judge shall judge him: but if a man sin against the Lord, who shall intreat for him? Notwithstanding they hearkened not unto the voice of their father, because the Lord would slay them.
1 Samuel 2:29
29 Wherefore kick ye at my sacrifice and at mine offering, which I have commanded in my habitation; and honourest thy sons above me, to make yourselves fat with the chiefest of all the offerings of Israel my people?
INTRODUCTION: A parent is a person who is responsible for the care, upbringing and well-being of a child. He/she can be biological, legal or custodian. Some parents are firm, while others are indulgent. Some are attentive, while others are absent-minded. As a Christian parent, raising your children to please God and thrive in life is a big responsibility. Understanding various parenting styles through the degrees of “responsiveness” (the extent to which parents are warm and sensitive to their children) and “demandingness” (the extent of control parents put on their children) is crucial.
LESSON OUTLINES
1. PERMISSIVE AND UNINVOLVED
2. AUTHORITARIAN AND AUTHORITATIVE
1. PERMISSIVE AND UNINVOLVED
Permissive parents are high in “responsiveness/love” but low in “demandingness/discipline.” They communicate openly and usually let their children decide for themselves, rather than give direction (1 Samuel 2:22-24). Rules and expectations are either not set or rarely enforced (1 Samuel 3:13). They give in to their children’s demands to make them happy and avoid conflicts, even at their own expense (Luke 15:12). Delinquent behaviours and the inability to make the right decisions are traits common under permissive parenting. However, it has the potential to increase self-esteem and creativity in children.
Neglectful/Uninvolved parents are low in “responsiveness/love” and low in “demandingness/discipline.” They usually let their children fend for themselves, perhaps because they are indifferent to their needs. They offer zero guidance and correction (1 Kings 1:5-6). They find it difficult to form close relationships as a result of personal experience, stress, etc. (1 Samuel 16:10-11; 2 Samuel 14:28). They are also cold (but not always intentional) as they often struggle with their issues. Children from neglectful parents tend to be self-dependent while they exhibit truancy, emotional withdrawal and the fear of becoming dependent on others (Proverbs 29:15).
2. AUTHORITARIAN AND AUTHORITATIVE
Authoritarian parents are high in “demandingness/discipline” but low in “responsiveness/love.” They enforce strict rules with little consideration of their children’s socio-emotional needs. In an attempt to be in control, authoritarian parents often talk to their children without expecting feedback. Their rigid parenting style uses harsh discipline, justified as “tough love” (1 Samuel 20:30). Low self-esteem, depression, aggression and poor social skills are common traits in these children, although they may show signs of discipline and respect for authority.
Authoritative parents are high in “responsiveness/love” and high in “demandingness/discipline.” They set clear rules and expectations for their children while they practice flexibility and understanding. They communicate frequently; they listen to and take into consideration their children’s thoughts, feelings and opinions (Genesis 22:7-8). They allow natural consequences to occur, especially for wrong-doings but use those opportunities to help their children reflect and learn. Authoritative parents nurture, support and are in tune with their children’s needs (Ephesians 6:4). They guide them through open and honest discussions to teach values and reasoning (Proverbs 22:6). Children who have authoritative parents tend to be self-disciplined, socially competent and can think for themselves (e.g., Mordecai and Esther, Naomi and Ruth). Their chances of displaying negative traits common in children trained by authoritarian, permissive or uninvolved parents are usually very low.
CONCLUSION
Understand that your parenting style will greatly affect your children’s lives.
QUESTIONS
1. Identify one weakness of each of the permissive and uninvolved parents.
2. State three strengths of authoritative parents.
FURTHER READINGS:
Sunday: Proverbs 22:6 (KJV)
Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.
Monday: Genesis 22:7-8 (KJV)
7 And Isaac spake unto Abraham his father, and said, My father: and he said, Here am I, my son. And he said, Behold the fire and the wood: but where is the lamb for a burnt offering?
8 And Abraham said, My son, God will provide himself a lamb for a burnt offering: so they went both of them together.
Tuesday: Ephesians 6:4 (KJV)
And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
Wednesday: 1 Samuel 20:30 (KJV)
Then Saul’s anger was kindled against Jonathan, and he said unto him, Thou son of the perverse rebellious woman, do not I know that thou hast chosen the son of Jesse to thine own confusion, and unto the confusion of thy mother’s nakedness?
Thursday: 1 Samuel 16:10-11 (KJV)
10 Again, Jesse made seven of his sons to pass before Samuel. And Samuel said unto Jesse, The Lord hath not chosen these. 11 And Samuel said unto Jesse, Are here all thy children? And he said, There remaineth yet the youngest, and, behold, he keepeth the sheep. And Samuel said unto Jesse, Send and fetch him: for we will not sit down till he come hither.
Friday: 1 Kings 1:5-6 (KJV)
5 Then Adonijah the son of Haggith exalted himself, saying, I will be king: and he prepared him chariots and horsemen, and fifty men to run before him.6 And his father had not displeased him at any time in saying, Why hast thou done so? and he also was a very goodly man; and his mother bare him after Absalom.
Saturday: Proverbs 23:13-14 (KJV)
13 Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. 14 Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell.
ASSIGNMENT: Mention five possible defects in children of ‘authoritarian parents’ (2×5=10 Marks).
RCCG Sunday School HYMN
- O Sunday School, on the Lord’s day,
O how I love Thee well,
I am happy, it makes me glad
To rejoice at Thy birth. - O Sunday School, on the Lord’s day,
Thy friendship suits me well,
Both young and old will sing Thy song,
We long for Sunday School. - O Sunday School, on the Lord’s day,
Christ was Thy first teacher,
The Holy Spirit, great teacher,
Does manifest in thee. - O Sunday School, on the Lord’s day,
This testimony is sure,
That God, the Father Almighty,
Poured His blessing on Thee. - O Sunday School, on the Lord’s day,
Though the sun be so bright,
Or if the clouds black with rain,
I’ll be in Sunday School. - O Sunday School, on the Lord’s day,
I rejoice to see Thee,
Will thou pass over me today?
Without my being blest?
