Topic: Beware Of Marriage Destroyers (Part 2)
Welcome to this week’s teaching on Family Matters. I started this teaching last week and I explained to you how wrong company and slothfulness destroy marriages. By now, I know you would have separated from every wrong company, association, friends and you must have got rid of every act of slothfulness and laziness. I see God visiting you with the rewards of obedience to His Word that you put in practice in your life, just the way you have always desired in your heart in Jesus’ name!
This week, I would be showing you two other things that can destroy marriage and family. They are ANGER and BITTERNESS.
ANGER is a strong feeling of annoyance and hostility. It is human to get angry at one time or the other but it becomes inhuman when you allow the feeling to take over you, your sense of reasoning and thereby leading you to sin. God’s Word says: Be angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath (Ephesians 4:26).This means that if you are angry, do not let it lead you into sin by nursing your grudge. Don’t let the day end with the anger still in you; get over it quickly. When you hold on to anger, you open the door to sin.
If you get upset about the way your spouse does certain things at certain times, instead of exploding and speaking cruel words which can cause irreparable damage, control your emotions and take a walk or go to the prayer closet, until your anger simmers down. Anger is like a kettle of boiling water and as long as the fire is on, the water will boil faster. To cool the water, you need to turn off the source of fire, place the kettle on a cool surface and give it time to cool down. When this is done, the water that was formerly boiling will become cool enough even to drink. Some other people try to suppress anger. They get angry but they swallow it, pretending that everything is all right and put a smile on their faces. They are like bottles of Coca-cola that is been shaken, once the lid is opened, the liquid rushes out in torrents. Bottling up anger is very risky, and an explosion is only a matter of time.
You can let off steam by discussing the issues at a right time or better still, pray to God about it. Tell God exactly how you feel and allow Him to speak peace to you. Anger kills! A good example of this is found in Genesis 49:5/7 which says: Simeon and Levi are brethren… cursed by their anger, for it was fierce and their wrath, for it was cruel: I will divide them in Jacob, and scatter them in Israel. Also, anger is a higher level of foolishness as stated in Ecclesiastes 7:9: Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools. It has the same consequences as murder (Matthew 5:22). Anger must be dealt with, if you want to avoid the shame that division and scattering brings to a family.
Another thing that destroys marriage is BITTERNESS. Bitterness starts from a very little thing that might have caused hurt by your spouse or any member of your family and you refuse to forgive and forget. Every time you remember the incident, you are hurt all over again. Watch it! That is a root of bitterness springing up gradually. It will eventually lead to trouble if it is not nipped in the bud. The Word says: Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled (Hebrews 12:15). Once bitterness gains access into your heart, it will magnify itself and begin to dominate you. You lose your rest to troubles, malice and disagreements. For instance, if you are bitter against your spouse, when he or she is in the sitting room, you will want to be in the bedroom; there is usually no rest within you. Bitterness blocks every access to God’s blessings upon you and your family. It seeks to steal and frustrate the grace of God from you. It is an unholy act that rubs you of God’s holy presence and usually, has the price as unforgiveness. The Word of God says: Let all bitterness… be put away from you, with all malice (Ephesians 4:31). To do this, you must forgive those who have offended you, forgive and forget completely so that you live a peaceful and burden-free life. The principle of instant forgiveness has helped me a great deal. My husband and I practice it and it has paid off for us. It pays to forgive!
There was a lady who after a decade of marriage decided that her marriage was a thorn in her flesh. She moved out of her home and filed for a divorce. However, in the process she got born again and after reading my book, Marriage Covenant, and some other anointed books, she discovered she had been living in self-righteousness, bitterness and unforgiveness towards her husband. After this discovery she forgave him and God miraculously healed her marriage. In her own words, she is having a honeymoon now. Honour and joy were restored once more to her marriage.
Anger and bitterness are little things that destroy marriage, home and family faster than you know it and the first person to seek help from is God. Help from God will come faster for you when you are born again, thereby allowing you to receive grace to combat off anger and bitterness. If, peradventure, you, the reader, is not born again and you want to accept Jesus as your Lord and personal Saviour, then say this prayer in faith: Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. I accept You as my Lord and personal Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for delivering me from sin and satan to serve the living God and thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.
Congratulations! If you prayed this simple prayer of faith with me, you are now born again and a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).
With this, you are guaranteed all-round rest and peace in Jesus’ Name! Call or write to share your testimonies with me through firstname.lastname@example.org, 07026385437 OR 08141320204.
For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).
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Pastor Faith Oyedepo is the wife of Bishop David Oyedepo, the founder of the Living Faith Church Worldwide a.k.a. Winners’ Chapel, and Senior Pastor of Faith Tabernacle, Canaanland, Ota, Nigeria.