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Author: Kemi Oyedepo

Topic: Look Inward

A disastrous foundation for marriage is basing your choice of a spouse on their physical appearance. Please note that physical appearance does not exist perpetually. You must look beyond the external when making the decision of whom to marry. Proverbs 31:30 says “Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised”. Looks are really not everything!

Single women and men are always looking for a man or woman that looks a particular way, to the extent of shunning some potential spouses who, in actual fact may be God’s choice for them. While there is absolutely nothing wrong with being attracted to your future spouse, we should be asking God for someone who has a heart after Him, someone who has a glorious future, someone who will add value to you and someone who will be a willing participant in ensuring God’s concept of marriage is established in your own home. A person who has a heart for God may go to the extent of making the beauty and the qualities in you stand out unlike the one who is only handsome or beautiful for nothing; with nothing to offer.

What is the point of being married to someone who is so handsome or so beautiful yet has a bad character and is not willing to change or is constantly tearing you down, among other things? That is not God’s intention of marriage. Looks are illusive; everything that is required to build a formidable home is beyond it. To go into marriage because of the physical appearance of a person is to set your future home up for destruction.

When I see people who are so obsessed with the looks of a person, it brings to light that person’s immaturity. When any man approaches you as a lady, look inward first; pay more attention to his spirit, his character, etc. The same goes for any man who has his eye on a lady; look inward. Accept this truth: it is the heart of a person that makes him/her attractive, not the outward appearance.

Placing all your attention on the outward appearance is the beginning of trouble. Look to God to make the right choice!


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