Author Pastor Faith Oyedepo

Accepting Marital Responsibilities [Part 3]

Dear Reader,

Calvary greetings to you, in the name of Christ Jesus! I have shared with you for the past weeks, your responsibilities of building your home and the man’s leadership position. This week, I want to teach on the tool for effective leadership.

Man, I want to say here that your placement in the Kingdom of God, is determined by how well you rule your home. If you cannot rule your house well, God will not allow you to rule His church, because He knows that you will not succeed there.

Are you a leader? Men who are “natural” leaders have no trouble answering this question in the affirmative. They know how to take over, control, guide, and get things done. Some men are not strong or natural leaders in the home? The Word of God says: One that rules well his own house, having his children in subjection with all gravity; (For if a man know not how to rule his own house, how shall he take care of the church of God?) (Timothy 3:4-5). If you cannot rule your house well, there is a limit to how far you can go in the things of God.

To rule the home well, therefore, love is a necessary ingredient that a man must possess for effective leadership. Christ rules the Church with the rod of love also, for the man to succeed, he must rule his home with the same rod. It is a scriptural commandment for the man to love his wife, as Christ loves the church. The Word of God says: Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her (Ephesians 5:25). Your unconditional acceptance of your wife is not based upon her performance, but on her worth as God’s gift to you. If you want to love your wife unconditionally, always be sure her emotional tank is full. One of the best ways to do that is to love her constantly. Let her know verbally that you value her, respect her and love her.

There is no question that words and actions communicate love. You need to do both. As Apostle John wrote in one of his letters: Let us not love with words or tongue, but with actions and in truth (1 John 3:18). One of the missing ingredients in male leadership in homes, is sacrificial action.

“Head” does not mean male dominance, where a man lords it over a woman and demands her total obedience to his every wish and command. God never viewed women as second-class citizens. His Word clearly states that we are all equally His children and are of equal value and worth before Him. As Galatians 3:28 tells us: There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus (Galatians 3:28).

The husband, however, is to exercise his leadership role under the authority of Christ, who is his head and the example he should follow in exercising his role. As the leader, he has a responsibility to provide for and protect his wife and children, and is responsible, together with his wife, for the moral well-being of his family.  God has established a structure in which “the head of the woman is man”.  This is evident from creation, witnessed to by “nature” and supported by universal Christian practice.
The welfare of the home has been committed into the hands of the man. He has to make provisions for his household. The Word of God says: But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he has denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel (I Timothy 5:8).

It is the responsibility of the man to provide specially for his own house both spiritually, materially and financially. He must ensure that his family member have what to eat and wear. Some men make provision for their village meetings, relations and friends at the expense of their immediate family members. This is contrary to scriptures!

To have access to this tool of love to rule your family, you must first of all accept the love that Christ offered on the cross, by giving your life to Him. Giving your life entails confessing your sins, forsaking them and accepting Jesus as your Saviour and Lord. If you are ready for this experience, please say this prayer:

Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and Satan, to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.

Congratulations!  You are now born again! Till I come your way next time, please call or write, and share your testimonies with me through: E-mail:,; Tel.  No: 08141320204; 07026385437.
For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all the Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores:

Making Marriage Work
Marriage Covenant
Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).
Click Here To Read Other Messages Written By Pastor Faith Oyedepo

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