Pastor Faith Oyedepo: What About Divorce? [Part 2]
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Topic: What About Divorce? [Part 2]
Dear Reader,
You are welcome to another wonderful time in God’s presence. I see God meet you at the very point of your needs today, in Jesus’ name.
Last week, we saw that God’s intention was not to see the man and his wife divorced. This means, divorce is not of God. This week, I will be sharing with you on what I titled, The Place of Forgiveness.
There is no way two people living together will not be able to offend each other. We are not perfect people, and we make mistakes. Learning to forgive is one of the most important lessons one must face, as we grow in our Christian lives. Forgiveness is the basis of our Christian faith. We learn to forgive, because God asked us to forgive. We learn to forgive because we too need to be forgiven.
We must always try to remember that it really does not matter, why someone has chosen to hurt us. What really matters is that we recognize that forgiveness is for us. We do not forgive and condone, rather, we release our hearts from the anger and pain that come when bad things happen to us. Since we are not the judge on this earth, we must leave that part to our Father in Heaven.
We must, however, not let the hurts that we face and the unforgiving spirit rule our lives and hearts. This particular anger is so life-destroying. Many people, right now, are walking around carrying tremendous hurts, anger, feelings of revenge and hatred toward someone that they cannot let go. If you do not release these feelings in forgiveness, the only person who will be hurt is YOU !
Look at this testimony:
“Somebody had offended me and I had in turn vowed never to forgive him. But as I attended the Convention and heard the devastating effect forgiveness could have in my life, I repented of it and willingly let him who had hurt me go. Mysteriously, a disease I had carried about in my body for some years disappeared, and I was totally healed.” –F. Eleazar
Which one of us has not wronged God at one time or the other? Despite this, He does not cast us away but allows us to confess our sins and return to Him. There is nothing your spouse has done that cannot be forgiven. Even when you feel betrayed and let down, God’s grace is available to help you put the past behind. Ephesians 4:32 encourages us to be tender- hearted, not adamant, ready to forgive even as God has forgiven you.
The first person to apologize to, is God. You must go to Him in prayer and admit that you are at fault. Confess your sins of bitterness, hatred, anger, resentment and accept His forgiveness (I John 1:9). You cannot go to God refusing to see your part in the crisis; that’s pride. Even if you cannot really say how you fuelled the fire, you can still ask for His forgiveness.
Nehemiah had not sinned against God. But as he interceded for his people, he admitted to being a part of their errors. God’s Word says: …Both I and my father’s house have sinned. We have dealt very corruptly against thee… (Nehemiah 1;6,7).
Secondly, when you consider all that God has forgiven you of, you will be wicked to refuse to forgive your spouse.
In marriage when forgiveness is needed, we must do so wholly and completely so that the marital trust can begin to heal again. In marriage, the knowledge that we are committed to forgiveness as Christ has given to us both, is part of the bond we share to care for each other. Knowing this in our hearts allows us to be ourselves with each other. It also will make you to want to become a better person for your mate and your marriage.
The forgiving process can be slow, but it begins by releasing this pain to God and gradually coming to complete forgiveness in your heart. It means putting the eyes of Jesus on and looking straight at the person who has hurt you.
It means leaving all judgment to God for others. It means trying everyday to leave the anger with God, until one day you notice that your heart has become lighter, and your face begins to brighten and you quietly know that with Jesus you are not alone. Dear God, I come today with a heavy heart. I have been hurt and I don’t know what to do. I know I must learn to forgive, and release this pain to You. Please help me to let go of this pain Father.
If you have truly forgiven, plead the Blood of Jesus to purge out bitterness, unforgiveness, hatred and the like. When memories of past wrongs come to your mind, plead the Blood of Jesus. When your heart is free of evil, fill it with all that is good, true, lovely, of good report, praise worthy and pure (Philippians 4:8).
Your words must reflect the new state of your heart. Speak good of your spouse, encourage him/her and praise him/her. Even if he/she is not automatically transformed, keep speaking until you see a change. Let your actions correspond with your thoughts and speech. Let your countenance mirror your heart, and healing will come to your home. I see God doing a new thing in your home right now in Jesus’ name!
Friend, the grace to forgive is the preserve of the redeemed. You are redeemed by confessing your sins and accepting Jesus as your Lord and Saviour. If you are set for it, please say this prayer:
Lord, I come to You today. I am a sinner. I can’t help myself, forgive me of my sins. From today, I accept You as my Lord and my Saviour. Now I know I am born again. Thank You, Jesus!
Congratulations!
You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org, and conselling@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.
For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores:
Marriage Covenant,
Making Marriage Work,
Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).
