RCCG Sunday School TEACHER’s Manual 23 December 2018 Lesson 17 – Before You Say “I Do”

TOPIC: Before You Say “I Do”

OPENING PRAYER: Father, help our youth to comport themselves decently and orderly on the matter of marriage. (Scroll down for RCCG SUNDAY SCHOOL 23 DECEMBER 2018 HYMN)

MEMORY VERSE: “Let all things be done decently and in order.” 1 Corinthians 14:40 (scroll down for RCCG SUNDAY SCHOOL 23 DECEMBER 2018 HYMN)

BIBLE PASSAGE: Genesis 29:11-20 KJV (RCCG Sunday School TEACHER’s Manual 23 December 2018)

11 And Jacob kissed Rachel, and lifted up his voice, and wept.

12 And Jacob told Rachel that he was her father’s brother, and that he was Rebekah’s son: and she ran and told her father.

13 And it came to pass, when Laban heard the tidings of Jacob his sister’s son, that he ran to meet him, and embraced him, and kissed him, and brought him to his house. And he told Laban all these things.

14 And Laban said to him, Surely thou art my bone and my flesh. And he abode with him the space of a month.

15 And Laban said unto Jacob, Because thou art my brother, shouldest thou therefore serve me for nought? tell me, what shall thy wages be?

16 And Laban had two daughters: the name of the elder was Leah, and the name of the younger was Rachel.

17 Leah was tender eyed; but Rachel was beautiful and well favoured.

18 And Jacob loved Rachel; and said, I will serve thee seven years for Rachel thy younger daughter.

19 And Laban said, It is better that I give her to thee, than that I should give her to another man: abide with me.

20 And Jacob served seven years for Rachel; and they seemed unto him but a few days, for the love he had to her.

Also Read: Open Heaven 23 December 2018 – Good Measure

LESSON INTRODUCTION:
The foundation of a godly marriage must be properly laid on sound moral and Biblical principles. Before the exchange of vows, where the Christian brother and sister will say ‘I do’, they should have passed through the phase of courtship and ensure that all things are done decently and in order. 1 Cor. 14:40; Amos 3:3. The intending couple should also watch out for some ‘red flags’ before saying ‘I do’.

TEXT REVIEW: GENESIS 29:11-20 “HE IS MY SISTER’S SON”
The seven years’ service given to Jacob by Laban to marry Rachel which was later increased to fourteen years could be considered as a time of courtship between the intended couples. This period provides the opportunity for the couple to know each other and their parents too.
i. In today’s Bible passages, the “know-your-selves” escapade began with Jacob who introduced himself to Rachel(his future wife) as the son of Rebekah and that he was her father’s(Laban) brother (cousin). Gen 29:12a.
ii. Rachel on her part passed the information to her father. It wasn’t a secret affair as some prefer to do in our days. Gen. 29:12b
iii. The father of Rachel (Laban) on his part knows the genealogy of the extended family and with gladness and enthusiasm embraced his sister’s son and brought him to his house. This is the parental acceptance of the son-in-law. Gen 29:13. In our days, many husbands-to-be are rejected by the in-law from day one. Many don’t even know the origin of their spouses. They just meet at eatery, joints, concerts and off they cohabit as couples. This is wrong.
iv. Jacob loved Rachel. This was not in despute as evidenced in the phrase, “Jacob kissed Rachel”. Laban loved Jacob too. He embraced him and brought him to the house. Gen. 29:11-13. In our days, many entered into marriage agreement without true love.
v. True love has a prize which must be paid. Jacob was willing to pay the prize for love. He said, “I will serve the seven years for Rachel”. Gen.29:18-20.
vi. Through the period of service for love, Jacob was able to discover the other side of Laban which showed that he was a deceiver. He accommodated the flaw and later in life had to flee to free himself from his father in-law’s twist. Gen. 31:20-21. God had to intervene. Gen. 31:24, 40-42. Pure yes of understanding must not be beclouded in our courtship.

LESSON OUTLINE 1: IMPORTANCE OF COURTSHIP
QUESTION 1:
Why is courtship important?
ANSWER:
i. To make plans, relate and reach a compromise on so many issues pertaining to their future together.
ii. To lay a Biblical foundation of a happy married life. 1Thess. 5:21.
iii. To secure parental consent. Gen. 4:54-59.
iv. To get to know each other intimately apart from carnal knowledge and illicit romance. 1 Cor. 6:18-20; Rom. 12:1-2.
v. To know each other’s strengths and weaknesses, likes and dislikes, parents, etc

QUESTION 2: What are the Bible-based activities which the intended couple should carry out during courtship?
Answer
i. Prayer and study of the word God together. 1 These. 5:17
ii. Counselling with Pastors or spiritual parents. Prov. 11:14.

QUESTION 3: Why should secluded places to be avoided in courtship?
Answer:
To prevent satanic advances/temptation 2. Cor. 2:11;1Thess.5:27.

LESSON OUTLINE 2: RED FLAG TO WATCH OUT FOR
QUESTION 1: What ate the dangers signs which the intended couple should look out for during courtship?
Answer:
Irrational jealousy, deception, domineering tendency, physical/emotional abuse, violence, aggression cruelty toward animal or man, alcoholism, heretic influence, isolation, drug abuse, smoking, disrespect for boundaries, privacy/personal space or low moral values and host of others.

NOTE: Student could add to the list

QUESTION 2: Why must intended couple look out for these signs?
Answer:
Because human being has tendency to hide their true personality to achieve their purpose.

QUESTION 3: What should you do if you see any of the warning signs?
Answer:
i. Seek advice of Pastors, spiritual leaders or marriage counsellors. Mark 14:38; Prov. 15:22; 19:20.
ii. Avoid do or die affairs that could jeopardize your future like Jacob. Jer. 29:11; Gen. 31:24-42.
iii. You may consider a broken courtship instead of a broken home. Eccl. 10:10; 1 Cor. 7:15b.

CLASS ACTIVITY 1 & 2: Students who participated in the questions and answers activities should score 20 marks.

SUMMARY: Courtship is very essential in marriage.

CONCLUSION: Watch and pray before you say I do.

EVALUATION: What are the benefits of courtship?

CLOSING PRAYER: Father, don’t let our youth lose their marriages to faulty counselling/ courtship.

ASSIGNMENT: Find out five (5) things which parents should avoid in their children’s courtship.

Read previous RCCG Sunday School Teacher’s Manual Here

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RCCG SUNDAY SCHOOL 23 DECEMBER 2018 HYMN

  1. O Sunday School, on the Lord’s day,
    O how I love Thee well,
    I am happy, it makes me glad
    To rejoice at Thy birth.
  2. O Sunday School, on the Lord’s day, Thy friendship suits me well,
    Both young and old will sing Thy song,
    We long for Sunday School.
  3. O Sunday School, on the Lord’s day,
    Christ was Thy first teacher,
    The Holy Spirit, great teacher,
    Does manifest in thee.
  4. O Sunday School, on the Lord’s day,
    This testimony is sure,
    That God, the Father Almighty,
    Poured His blessing on Thee.
  5. O Sunday School, on the Lord’s day,
    Though the sun be so bright,
    Or if the clouds black with rain,
    I’ll be in Sunday School.
  6. O Sunday School, on the Lord’s day,
    I rejoice to see Thee,
    Will thou pass over me today?
    Without my being blest?