Pastor Faith Oyedepo

Keys to Effective Communication in Marriage [Part 4]

Dear Reader,

So far, I have taught on the foundation of effective communication and the keys of listening, talking and understanding. There is no doubt, God has opened your eyes to see something that will improve your communication with your spouse and family members. You shall not fail in Jesus’ name!

Today, we shall be looking at what I captioned, Corrupt Communication! Evidently, there are factors to beware of, that stand against the will to build effective communication in marriage and home.
Choosing the right words is a must for couples and other members of the family, if there must be a good relationship between them. Corrupt communication is the opposite of edifying communication. You can pass across the negative, just as effectively as the positive. Any communication that tears down, separates or pollutes the mind is said to be corrupt.

This form of communication actually proceeds from the mouth, but has its root in the heart. When all you think about your spouse is negative and your focus is only on his or her deficiencies, eventually all that will proceed out of your mouth will be corrupt. God’s Word says: …For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh (Matthew 12:34).

Below is a testimony of a sister, who God healed from corrupt communication:

“Some time in 1990, my husband lost his job and from then, our struggles started. Later, a sister in Christ gave me some money to start a business. Since then, I began to ignore the teachings of the Bishop and his wife on pride, and no longer respected my husband. I insulted him whenever he talked to me, because I was the one fending for the family. He began to complain of the way I talked to him, saying that there was no sign to show that I was born again, that I was behaving like one of the worldly women.

Yesterday, I came for the International Women Convention, and there was a miming presentation on the use of the tongue. I learnt how to speak correctly to my husband, and regretted the indecent way I had treated him in the past. On reaching home, I knelt down to greet him and he was surprised, because I had not done that before. There and then, he believed that something good would come out of the convention.

Formerly, whenever he wanted us to have our morning prayers, I would shun him and tell him to say his own prayers, that I would pray whenever it pleased me. But this morning, I was the one that woke him and the children up for prayers.” – Omotosho, O.

There are some homes that are badly damaged and in serious trouble, because the tongue is not being controlled; they are victims of corrupt communication. God’s Word says: Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers (Ephesians 4:29).

Some men call their wives and children all kinds of terrible names out of anger. Some women are full of nagging. I want you to know that God did not create the tongue to speak evil words; rather, it is meant to be an instrument of edification. Sweet and bitter water cannot proceed from the same source at the same time. So many people misuse the tongue, simply because they lack an understanding of its purpose. You have the responsibility to guard what you say with your mouth.
Corrupt Communication has a lot of consequences, among which are:

  • It Brings Strife (Proverbs 15:1). A wise man once said, “Ninety per cent of the friction of daily life is caused by the wrong tone of voice
  • It Destroys Destiny (Proverbs 13:3; Numbers 14:22-24). The 10 Spies destroyed their destinies by the words of their mouth.
  • It Procures Death (Acts 5:1-10). This was the case with Ananias and Sapphira. They lied with their mouths and procured the wrath of God.
  • It Leads To Hell (Revelation 21:8). All liars shall not only die physically here, but shall have a part in the second death.
  • It Leads You And Others To Sin (Ecclesiastes 5:6, Genesis 3). By deceit, which is manifested by words from the mouth, the serpent made man to fall. It is a sin to make others commit error, by the words of your mouth. The words of your mouth matter to God. Guide it!

Note that successful communication equals successful marriage. This is preceded by a life in Christ. Someone has rightly said, “To live in sin is an old fashion.” Life in Christ turns you to a new man, and helps you to live life without stress. If you this is your wish, please say this prayer of faith with me:

Dear Lord, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins.  Cleanse me with Your precious Blood. Deliver me from sin and Satan, to serve the Living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour.  Now I know I am born again!

Congratulations! Till I come your way again next week, call or write, and share your testimonies with me through: contact@faithoyedepo.org, counselling@faithoyedepo.org OR 07026385437, 08141320204
For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all the Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores:

  • Marriage Covenant
  • Making Marriage Work
  • Building a Successful Family
  • The Effective Minister’s Wife and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

Click Here To Read Other Messages Written By Pastor Faith Oyedepo